Last night, I hit a new low on multiple levels at dinner at Menu 6, the new restaurant on Larchmere. First of all, I forgot my credit cards at home. Our “free” meal was sponsored by my good friends Mike and Lauren. I have no excuse for this, beyond I must have sub-conciously wanted to punish Mike and Lauren for being friends with me. Not bringing money to eat at a typically expensive Cleveland restaurant = New Low #1.
There is plenty of press about the uniquely designed menu and approach to the food, if you are interested. As a conflicted vegetarian, there wasn’t much here for me. I ordered fries to compliment the calamari ordered by our table as appetizers to share. The fries were lukewarm at best and the vinegar aioli was well mayonnaise that tasted like vinegar (really…yes). The cress salad with a triangle of humboldt fog cheese just didn’t work. The dressing was balsamic blah and while humboldt fog by Cypress Grove is one of my top 5 cheeses in the world (if you are ok with Truffle indulge in their Truffle Tremor – I could live on this cheese), the presentation was whatever – the flavor was too sweet and the salad was just dissapointing.
For a main course I ordered three sides. The salted fingerling potatoes were placed on a plat, the end result looked like 5 little penises on my plate. Perfectly cooked, and ok tasting but I would never suggest anybody get them. The bleu spinach didn’t work. It was a good idea to keep the spinach raw, but the combination of cream and blue cheese was somewhat anonymous. The only redeeming side was the 4 cheese penne. This was a nice size serving and the penne was cooked well. I love cheese and it is hard for me to complain about too much cheese in the sauce, but excessive dressing is a trend at Menu 6. I enjoy pasta 4-5 times a week, in the end I prefer my pasta at home. This is my way of saying, if I am going to eat unhealthy pasta – it should be better than what I cook at home, this wasn’t better.
I looked at what everybody else at the table ate and I wasn’t envious. Amy felt there was a heavy hand on the spice and sauce of her scallops and ribs. Mike left most of his bowl of chowder but polished off his crab. Lauren’s dish looked the best, a large bowl with a piece of fish on top of pasta with a light red sauce. This may be the dish to get at Menu 6 as everybody agreed the sauce was delicious. Dessert was ice cream sandwiches. Amy complained the ice-cream was flavorless, whatever we dipped them in was flavorless as well. The 3 little sandwiches were cute, but most toll house cookies I have had blow them out of the water. The cookies would not hold up on their own.
What would have saved this meal? Probably good wine. There wine was drinkable in the $35 a bottle range but certainly not delicious. Mike and I split 2 bottles and the second bottle was blah (Epifany – Gypsy from the Santa Barbara Coast). This is not a problem limited to Menu 6. Cleveland restaurants charge too much for sub-par wine. It is almost as if the chefs do not understand that if you have a good bottle of wine you enjoy the food more. Rather than doubling the price of wine, kill it as a profit item and sell good wine at cost. The ends do justify the means. Serve up a great meal with good wine and you will get rave reviews. Serve up an average meal that is expensive with over-priced wine and you get a “who cares” from me. It is doubtful I will want to spend $150 per couple at Menu 6 again (or even have my friends pay that).
The only restaurant in this North East Ohio are that has a GREAT wine list is Downtown 140 in Hudson – which also has a delicious menu. Fire is improving their wine list and Dante has some reasonably priced drinkable wines. These are all expensive restaurants that have delivered great above average meals recently. We need a food revolution in Cleveland. Less restaurants delivering better experiences, or I am going to start eating at home more on Saturday night.
We got a few dinners and breakfast out of this shopping, including delicious coffee from the hills of Chiapas (sacred area in the South Western coast of Mexico). From simple Pasta, to arroz con frijoles negras (rice and beans), sandwiches and of course quesadillas. The liquor section is very diverse. Basically everything you find in America, but very little vodka (I generally avoid vodka but have noticed there are no less that 30 brands at most bars these days). We focused on the Tequila section, surprisingly challenging. Why? We get the best Tequillas in America, there are a lot of brands, 100% Agave, but very little on the high end. I am probably just ignorant, but at home we usually get the Patron Anejo – oddly enough only available at the airport. We settled for the Don Julio Anejo, drinkable and no hangovers.
